Thursday, May 16, 2013

Choose Your Own Adventure

With a semi-sorta-I'm-still-trying-to-figure-it-out nursing baby my daily allotment of 24 hours are now split into 2 hour nursing-free activity increments. 

Unfortunately, there are still only a finite amount of things you can do in 2 hours (sometimes only 1 hour depending on how long it took the sorta nursing baby to go back to sleep). 

Here are the exciting choices:

A) Sleep
B) Laundry
C) General housework
D) Write thank you notes
E) Write a blog post
F) Take a shower
G) Eat
H) Do something enjoyable that I used to do 10 months ago

A (usually the winner)
Daisy wakes up an hour later confused, grumpy and feeling like a human buffet.
The End

Daisy staggers through the house shoving anything into the washing machine (forget separating colors and whites!), writing one thank you note, typing this blog post with one hand while other hand holds the pacifier in the baby's mouth, or obsessing over ironing napkins (Where did this sudden desire for domesticity come from? Daisy is known, neigh brags about, her slothly ways of household care. But she is suddenly overcome with the desire for some order and sanity in an insane world and ironed napkins are the batman call in her domestic sky)
The End

Since Daisy generally sees no one, this can be put off for a day or so until she feels uber gross or the baby is being fussy. Thennnnn she dumps the baby on JTS and stays in the shower for 30 life cleansing minutes.
The End

You can eat cereal for every meal. 
Cocoa pebbles v. Raisin Bran v. Cinnamon Toast Crunch
Variety is the spice of life.
The End

Every day Daisy tries to do one thing she personally enjoys. These activities usually have to be abbreviated. Read 2 pages of a book. Watch 10 minutes of a movie before falling asleep. Show up 20 minutes late to a massage she booked. Go for a walk around the ole rainforest (Issa prefers this option). Or combine E and H into one fast activity. Ahh simple pleasures.
The End

Hope you enjoyed your choice! 

Now back to the My Brest Friend prison system wench! 

Seriously, you click it around your waist so you can't escape. 
Even for water. The government should try it out for terrorists.

Does she really have two on that thing? And she is smiling? 


Katherine said...

hahaha- brest friend, my ass!

Daisy said...

none of the "nursing support pillows" are my friend.