Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Daisy Gets Serious and Asks Big Questions
Since I was but wee, my dad has been telling me that, "Life is a shit sandwich. You just take one bite at a time." And as I grew up whenever I complained about something (which is quite frequent) he would say, "How's that bite taste?" And right now, let me tell you, the bites are pretty shite.
On a whole I'm an optimistic person. I get misty eyed at sappy songs, overjoyed at season changes, Christmas gives me goosebumps, weddings make me want to hug the world, dogs with waggy tails make me laugh uncontrollably . There is a lot to love about how life goes on. So I usually firmly disagree with the shit sandwich version of life. I prefer to think of it as a giant bowl of macaroni and cheese with an occasional fly stuck in it. Just swallow it down with more cheese (o.k. done with that metaphor).
But here is what I think is the shitty part. You have to choose. Adulthood doesn't necessarily suck but its the damn choice of what to do with your time. Someone told me that there are three areas in your life: work, family, and friends and you can only be successful in two of these arenas at a time. This is the pits.
Yesterday I realized that I had been totally neglecting work and work was severely suffering. So now I have to reel back on the friends and family time so that I can somehow save myself this semester and produce something that is not completely embarrassing. But I'm a people person. I miss the people. I can't sit in my room at this computer day in and day out chain smoking and drinking Earl Grey alone here. Especially when I know there are people out there that I love to spend time with. Especially, especially if they are having fun without me. One of my favorite people was just visiting from London and I had to go home early to do work although every fiber of my being wanted to stay there drinking with her until 3AM because I might not see her for another 6 months. Isn't this is a valid use of your time? Spending hours with people who live an ocean away?
There is this book called, "Its not how good you are, its how good you want to be" aimed at graphic designers. The idea is in the title. So I ask myself: How good do I want to be? Enough to forgo friends and family? I don't really think so. Is it true you can only either leave behind a legacy of excellent, amazing work, or a happy family? Is either one better than the other? Am I relinquished to mediocre designer for the rest of my life because I like relationships with people more? Is that terrible? OR! And here is the big or.....am I just avoiding responsibility and adulthood and its time to take a really big bite and get on with it?
Talk amongst yourselves, I'm off to work.